Wednesday, March 31, 2021

Private people

 It’s another beautiful day here, a bit cooler in temps than I like but that’s ok...I have things I can do inside. Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about privacy and private people..private people are so misunderstood. They are often thought of as they have something to hide, they are anti social, maybe mentally ill...most outgoing people just can’t grasp that private people are just that...private! We simply enjoy our own company, we don’t think it necessary to share every aspect our our life with just everyone. Often times however private people have withdrawn due to bad experiences with others. Maybe they were bullied, or as a child they never felt heard so they just figure why speak or share...most are introverts that struggle with to much stimulation around them. They are often misjudged as being stuck up or not friendly. That is rarely the case. Most private introverted people have a lot to say. Most are intelligent and well studied. Why? Well, because we spend a great deal of time in our heads and reading anything we can find on any subject that sparks our interest. Private people find peace in their privacy. They enjoy just existing in peace and quiet and as little drama as possible. When drama does arise for them it’s absolutely horrific...they struggle immensely with getting settled again. Their privacy is their sanctuary. When someone pushes them to share aspects their life it is very off putting. I was told not long ago it was hard to be my friend because I was “closed off”. That really stung and I can’t get those words off my mind. The truth is I am a very loyal friend. I keep what you tell me to myself. I value your privacy as I value mine. I don’t understand why people feel as though you have to share all details of your life to be a friend. When I have tried to open up and discuss what’s important to me I get ignored or glossed over. So that tells me that  person is not someone really wanting to be my friend but to pry and be nosey. I’m not good with  small talk....I like deep meaningful conversation...that’s hard to find in the world we live in...I prefer phone calls to text or private messenging and in our electronic world no one does that much anymore...that’s hard for me too ...I guess when I blog I can put it all out there and feel ok with it. I always ask the “powers that be” to send even one person that needs to read what I write to make them feel better and know they are not alone.  If you read this and can relate feel free to comment and let me know! It’s always nice knowing others get it.

Until Next Time...

Remember it’s ok to be you!

Saturday, March 27, 2021

Unplug and find peace


This morning I got up extra early and started my day. It was quiet in the house as I started my coffee. My thoughts were positive and I smiled to myself as I smelled my coffee brewing. I am blessed! As the sun rose so did the dogs so I let them out and it smelled so nice outside, just does my heart good to see the green the grass, the blue sky, to hear the birds singing and my flowers in bloom and smell the earthy smell of springtime. I love my slow paced life and I think I appreciate more this year than I ever have. I had my coffee then ventured out to fill my bird feeders...when it warms a bit more I’ll go sit outside and just enjoy the sunshine. Being outside centers me, it is my home...I think even as a small child I had this odd connection to the outdoors like it’s where I belonged. Amongst the trees there is no judgement, in the woods there is no hate...in nature there is only what is....sitting on the earth there is healing.....it’s just peace...in tune with where you came from...the earth...we are connected...I sit outside barefoot with my feet on the ground, I feel the cool dampness and it awakens my soul with a feeling joy...It grounds me and for that time I am unplugged from all that worries me, all that hurts me, all that brings my heart sadness...I often wish I could stay outside forever in that place...but I can’t, so I enjoy the time I have and carry the peace with me throughout my day...when things bring negativity I often go outside to get away from it...take some time today to be still...to listen to what nature has to say...unplug, sit on the ground barefoot soaking up the sun...be grateful for all that you are and all that you have...and remember YOU are enough!

Until next time...

Love-n-light

Thursday, March 25, 2021

You are enough!


 Hello blog land! Hope your world is going great and you are staying positive and testing negative(for covid) :)

It's been a long but good week here on the homestead. Anytime we learn something it's a good week!

Today I'm going to write about how we view ourselves and our lives. I had a couple of moments this week that really got me into my head and looking at my own shadows and seeing where I need to improve as a person but still remain true to who I am.

 

Late last week I commented in a group for homesteaders about gardening, canning, animal husbandry etc...just talking about what we do here. I never expected a response to my comment as in those groups there are so many people you tend to get lost in the shuffle. But, alas! 2 comments! Both were very positive but also made me think...the comment was "you are living my dream and I am so envious". While I don't condone envy at all, I think its one of the most destructive emotions there is it was a comment that taught me something...

I am a person that never feels good enough, you would think by my age I would have grown beyond that but I haven't, 'an area in my life that needs work, its a constant struggle. I grew up being told all the time I was not enough, I was not like my sister, or my cousin or whoever else they could think of at the time...The work I do is ripe with people not making you feel not good enough...Funny how I picked a line of work that makes me feel like my parents did...I digress....so when I saw this comment it stopped me in my tracks and I sat back and realized how ungrateful I am at times...I really do have a good life....I'm not wealthy, I don't have a fancy home, I don't have perfect kids, or anything that is perfect or even sought after by modern society today...so what do I have? I have a life that I love! A life farm man and I worked so hard to build...we have been through so much, yet here we are, living our dream....I have been lost in the all I don't have mentality I have forgotten to look around and see what I do have! I have so much more than most...It brought me to tears... I love my life...I am away from the hustle and bustle of town or city...My world is quiet, it is peaceful, it is serene...it is what we worked to create....I go into town and it exudes negative energy....all are so rushed and hurried...people are hateful and disrespectful....I rush to get back here....my safe place, my solitude, my absolutely beautiful life....It is slow paced, not hurried...it is quiet not filled with mind numbing noises...it is my heaven on earth....sadly, I had/have let all the 'noise' from others over ride my peace...all the negative comments we all hear daily on the tv, or radio...at work...with our friends and especially social media!....it gets in, it gets in our heads and hearts...we must not let it!

The truth is we will never be enough for some...some will never be able to accept who you are...they expect you to meet their expectations of who you should be...Yes! its hurtful to experience that or to hear comments that you are not what someone thinks you should be....the truth is, until someone walks the path and journey you have walked they have no right to judge where you are or how you are. Our creator created us each very unique...we are all unique because we all have a different purpose to fulfill in this life...my purpose is not yours and yours in not mine...I have my very own personal journey to walk, as do you...I am very private person, always have been...It doesn't make me defective in some way just because I don't share intimate details of my job or life with others...It's who I was created to be...I am a very reflective type person...I also feel things deeply..I tend to absorb other peoples energy, so what may not bother you will bother me for weeks at times until I process through the emotions. I have learned people will judge you no matter what...some will judge you in a positive way like the ladies that commented I was living the dream, they will never know how I really needed to hear/read that! It truly made my heart smile..but also snapped me out of dark place I was in...and then you have those that no matter how kind you are, how much you do or don't do it will never be enough, you will never be enough...But always remember who you are...you know why you are the way you are and if you are like me you are most likely working on it....You are under no obligation what so ever to meet the demands of someones expectations of you...unless of course you are are hurting someone else or breaking the law...I'm talking in terms of being WHO YOU ARE as a person...you are free to be an open book, you are free to be reserved, you are free to share whatever you are comfortable sharing with people and what they read into that is on them...I know for a fact people that do that have their own issues...Had a lady a few months ago accused me of not doing something in my job...she was adamant I did not do this thing...I actually laughed as I read her hateful remarks about me on a public forum...why did I laugh....because all she had to do was go check it out, the information was her fingertips...Sadly, though most people like being mean to others because they have serious self esteem issues...it gives them power...it would blow their power trip all to hell if they knew the truth...there have been judgemental people since the rise of mankind and there will be judgmental people until the demise of mankind...but you don't have to let them get you down...Never ever forget who you are....You are a beautiful soul put on this earth, at this time, in this pandemic to be a light....a beacon...someone that will rise above the shit thrown out there....people that are healers, light workers, different, don't fit the mold...we are ok! You are ok! It's ok to be you and its ok to be me....You may be a quiet, contemplative, reflective person or you may be outgoing and share it all or somewhere in between...BUT YOU MATTER and you were put here for a purpose...you have something to offer every person you meet...its up them if they take whatever you gave them and learn from it....you can't force it...Just be you, do you and the rest will fall into place...As you go about your day...remind yourself you are ok, you are worthy, you are needed, you are what the creator created, that is enough and you are so very loved!

Until next time....

Peace, Love and Light

Tuesday, March 23, 2021

Speaks Volumes

I did not write this - but WOW does it speak to my heart!!!  Worth the read.

Barely the day started and... it's already six in the evening.

Barely arrived on Monday and it's already Friday.

... and the month is already over.

... and the year is almost over.

... and already 40, 50 or 60 years of our lives have passed.

... and we realize that we lost our parents, friends.

and we realize it's too late to go back...

So... Let's try, despite everything, to enjoy the remaining time...

Let's keep looking for activities that we like...

Let's put some color in our grey...

Let's smile at the little things in life that put balm in our hearts.

And despite everything, we must continue to enjoy with serenity this time we have left. Let's try to eliminate the afters...

I'm doing it after...

I'll say after...

I'll think about it after...

We leave everything for later like ′′ after ′′ is ours.

Because what we don't understand is that:

Afterwards, the coffee gets cold...

afterwards, priorities change...

Afterwards, the charm is broken...

afterwards, health passes...

Afterwards, the kids grow up...

Afterwards parents get old...

Afterwards, promises are forgotten...

afterwards, the day becomes the night...

afterwards life ends...

And then it's often too late....

So... Let's leave nothing for later...

Because still waiting see you later, we can lose the best moments,

the best experiences,

best friends,

the best family...

The day is today... The moment is now...

We are no longer at the age where we can afford to postpone what needs to be done right away.

So let's see if you have time to read this message and then share it.

Or maybe you'll leave it for... ′′ later "...

And you'll never share it....